Fine With 50

As I sit in my lovely home with my equally lovely man, I reflect on my last 49 years.  I've tried many things, accomplished many things, failed at many things, wondered about many things, and have been afraid to try many things.  I've done... or not done all of this with very little regret.  These past years have formed who I am today.  I'd like to think that I am a good mother, daughter, sister, aunt, cousin and friend.  My children are my greatest accomplishments, and my granddaughters are my greatest joy.

I wish...
I wish I had known at a young age how to make memories; how to take a mental picture.
I wish I had stayed in touch with childhood friends and not waited for somebody to invent Facebook
I wish I had learned to speak Spanish
I wish I had applied myself more in high school
I wish I had date for prom
I wish I had my own talk show
I wish I wasn't afraid to write a book
I wish I could meet all of the extended family that I have met on Facebook
I wish my grandmothers were still alive
I wish some people weren't so mean
I wish for my children to have love, peace and success
I wish my all my children lived close by
I wish my best friends lived close by

I'm thankful...
I'm thankful my parents are still alive
I'm thankful for my precious babies
I'm thankful for my quiet time
I'm thankful for my peaceful life
I'm thankful that my parents always had music on while I was growing up
I'm thankful for the time I have to craft
I'm thankful I have faith
I'm thankful that I'm healthy
I'm thankful for hair dye
I'm thankful that I have a sense of humor
I'm thankful for the life lessons that I have learned
I'm thankful that I've been able to travel the world
I'm thankful that I'm not afraid to be alone
I'm thankful that I have reconnected with friends and family
I'm thankful to know that I have made a difference in somebody's life
I'm thankful for Randy and that I KNOW he loves me

Of course with time, there is change, and maybe next year these lists will change.  Change is good.  I truly believe that. I have always looked at the positive and negative aspect of everything, and have chosen to focus on the positive and stay upbeat I've been perceived as immature or unrealistic.  I've done it my entire life, and I'm not stopping now. 

Julian Fellowes, are you listening?

I'm just going to put it out there.  I want to... I need to be added to the cast of Downton Abbey.  At the end of season two, I had this brilliant idea of being, Violet, the boorish, spinster, slightly portly American cousin to Lady Cora who comes for an unscheduled visit.  Then to my astonishment, Shirley Maclaine is cast.  At first I was sad, and then I was inspired.  I had something with that idea, and because I am a professional and have been known to be flexible, I decided that I could work quite well with Shirl.  I think we would get along fabulously. 

There are so many possibilities for story lines.  Violet will always be in the right place at the right time, or will she?  She is very nosey and quickly avails herself to the pampered life of an aristocrat; even if it's borrowed time.  She knows everything about everybody in the house; upstairs and downstairs, and of course, there has to be romance.

So Mr. Fellowes... Jules, if you are listening, I would love to discuss the terms of my contract at your earliest convenience.

Best Regards
Violet

Shame Spiral

Wow, did I blow it or WHAT?  I guess it's evident that I have a follow-through problem.  I didn't even come close to achieving my goal of blogging every day.  I have no excuse.  I wanted to write a heartfelt and meaningful blog of which mostly women could relate.  Maybe there are some out there that have difficulties achieving goals.  I'm fine at work, but I guess when I get home I sort of decompress.

Here I am knocking on the door of 50, and there is so much going on in my life.  I'm not saying that I'm mad-crazy busy, but I'm definitely not bored.  I've been crafting a lot and recently did some Internet shopping to load up on craft supplies for holiday presents.  I will devote a post to my crafts shortly... I hope.  Please don't hold your breath.

Football season is upon us!!!!  Can I get a woot woot?  I met Nick Eason of the Arizona Cardinals NFL team.  He was a really nice man and now my friend on Facebook.  I'm hoping that we can get to more games this season.  There's nothing like being there.  My cousin will hopefully see some playing time with the Oregon Ducks this year.  You won't be able to miss him.  His last name spans from one shoulder to the other; Yruretagoyena!  I will continue to keep my eye on Jovan Belcher of the KC Chiefs.  He is a nice young man, and I hope he has a stellar season.  I'm glad I love football.  I've never felt like a football widow. 

I recently publicly apologized to son for being "that annoying fan in the stands."  We were watching a Diamondback's game the other night, and there was a very annoying woman screaming and cheering.  It was so noticable even with thousands of people in the stands.  I couldn't help but remember watching my son play football and baseball and being "that fan"; hence my apology.

I'm not going to promise anything about this blog.  All I can say is that I hope to post when the feeling moves me.

LOL

When was the last time you had a good laugh?  I mean a really good, aching belly, aching cheeks, no sound coming out, tears streaming down your face, snorting laugh.  I've heard it said that laughing is cathartic.  Researchers at the University of Maryland Medical Center reported the fact that laughter causes increased blood flow.  It's also known to reduce stress hormones.  It releases endorphins that can relieve some physical pain. Laughter also boosts the immune system.  In plain English, laughing simply makes you feel good.

We've all had those giggle fests.  You know the ones that are a series of contagious outbursts, and before you know it, everybody is laughing, and half the people have no idea why.  They just got the bug. And who can resist a baby laughing uncontrollably?  I had a good one tonight with my guy.  Except this time it involved mascara rolling down my face.

Laughing and happy thoughts are my medicine of choice when I'm feeling a little down.  Pollyanna was on the right track with The Glad Game.  Some would call it immature, but I call it brilliant.  We all should play the game when we can.  It doesn't solve anything, but it can make you feel a little better even if it's just a few minutes.

Female Football Fan

With the 2011 season winding down, I can't help but think about how I came to love football.

It all started in 1995 when I signed up my son for the town football league.  He was only 5 years old and in kindergarten.  To me, he was still a baby. At that age, they played flag football.  They were so young and  adorable dressed out in full gear.  The gear weighed more than they did. That first season was very comical.  When they fell, they looked like turtles stuck on their backs.  The shoulder pads were so wide and heavy they could get up.  The coaches ran around the field putting the boys back on their feet. 

When he started junior high school, he played school ball and continued to play on the town league.  I never missed a single game.  He played all the way through high school.  I had a bit of a meltdown when the last game ended.  It had been such a huge part of our lives for all those years.  The boys are men now, and I still love football.

I learned a lot about the game from the sidelines, and soon the sidelines were not enough for me.  I volunteered to be team mom, and team moms were allowed ON THE FIELD during half time.  

I wish more women knew more about football.  Maybe I should blog about female football fans or wannabe female football fans.  I could share with them my knowledge of the basics of the game so they can watch and understand what's going on on the field. 

I am still a big football fan, and when a season ends, I count the days until the next season starts.  If you're a soccer mom, lacrosse mom, baseball mom, or football mom, you know how all consuming having your kids in sports can be.  It was 13 years with my son, and I wouldn't trade one minute. I met my very best friends in those bleachers, and I'll save that for another post.

Words of Wisdom

I think this pretty much sums it up.  I found it on a friend's board on Pinterest.  What is Pinterest you ask?  It's a brilliant way to replace bookmarks on your browser.  Warning... it's very addicting!  I just sent invitations to join Pinterest to several Facebook friends; you're welcome, and I'm sorry. LOL

Read it again. There is a lot of truth in those two sentences.  I have to admit that the older I get, the less motivated I am to find out what it is that is taking shape for me. Is that age or laziness, or maybe it's contentment.  It doesn't mean that I'm not open to something fabulous calling my name.  If it calls, I will surely answer.

It's Not Over Until It's Over

This weekend there were several college bowl games, and the two that I watched were the Fiesta Bowl and the Rose Bowl.  Both of these games were the epitome of competition.  Each was played to the last minute possible, and then when you think it's over, it goes into overtime.   I need to remember that it's not over until it's over.  Like in football, you can work hard for every yard, keep your feet moving, wrap yourself around an obstacle and take it down, and ultimately reach the goal... or not  I need to use every play in the play book and not give up until that final whistle blows.  All four teams were exhausted by the time it was over.  They worked hard, and even though, for two of those teams, it didn't turn out the way they had hoped, they all played an awesome game and should be proud of their efforts.

 I love football, and this year I will do my best to score!  I need to push past what I think is the end of a project, task or idea and take it into overtime.  I know it's all a little cliché, and I'm okay with that.

A Dream Come True

A couple of days ago, I found out that a friend from high school realized a dream that she has had for several years.  She became a business owner.  She now owns a restaurant in Washington.  Why is this blog worthy you ask?  It's just another example of "rise".  Almost every rise takes a huge leap of faith.  Sometimes we just can't get beyond that initial step toward realizing a dream.  We've always been taught to take baby steps, but there are some things that take a little bit more.

Why the reluctance?  What stops us?  What causes us to stay in toxic relationships when we know we need to get out?  Why do we stay in jobs that bring us no fulfillment?  Why are we reluctant to evoke change where change is needed?  I wish I had the answer to all of these questions; or do I?  Let's face it, change can be a scary thing.

We need to ask ourselves if there is something that we want to do, but simply don't do it for whatever reason?   

Can you believe it...

It's 2012, and I've decided to attempt a blog.  Coming up with the title was pretty difficult.  I get that the title needs to mean something to the readers, but I think it ultimately needs to mean something to me.  "It's My Rise" came about by my search for a word that depicts empowerment and strength.  If you read my blog description, hopefully you will understand.

This year I've decided not to burden myself with resolutions which I suspect I will not achieve, if past years are any indication.  What I have decided to do is to just work from lists. Lists are an ideal way of staying organized and prioritized. Here are a couple of lists that I've started.

Things that I know will happen this year:

• I will turn 50 years old
• My kids will turn, 29, 23 and 21
• My grandbabies will turn 5 and 3
• I will learn to play the guitar

Things I would like to happen this year:

• Learn spanish
• Start a novel
• Devote more time to my crafts
• Blog

Hang with me through this journey, and we will both see if I can do this!

Happy New Year!